What to do when your Pride is Injured/How to Psychologically Abuse Someone

Over the course of the past few years, I’ve had the chance to learn quite a bit about dehumanizing people and psychological abuse. This is from dealing with my stalker or whoever he has handed the reins to. I actually have never spent much time harassing people, trying to harass them, and I’ve never been great at breaking the law. However, I’ve gained some expertise in this realm which I’d very much like to share.

Please pardon my sarcasm and laughing emojis below. I’m trying to not take this so seriously– I’ve only recently been able to see the humor in all of this, and I have to just laugh about how bizarre it is. If I take it personally, it benefits no one. If I laugh about it, it just makes my life easier.

At this point, I really feel that spreading awareness is important. Everyone I talk to says it’s healthy and valuable to talk about it, so I’m going to share a little bit about my life and what I have learned about being on the receiving end of psychological abuse. Talking through this and sharing it with others has given me peace of mind. It is absolutely cathartic and I recommend it to anyone who has been on the receiving end of this. Use your voice. In the words of John Mayer, say what you need to say.

Although I will not say the name of this individual here, I’m sure if you know him, you know exactly who this article is about (it’s not the 45th potus).

There are many silver linings to this situation. One of them is that my little sister has started giving me good advice on how to deal with bullies. She has Downs, and although most people are incredibly polite and kind to her, she has unfortunately dealt with bullying. So she gives me advice and I take it from someone who knows a thing or two.

Here are a few things I have learned, from the time this individual and I quit texting.

  1. If you don’t like the way Shannon looks, pay girls who look the way you would like for her to look to follow her around. For example, if you think Shannon needs to lose weight– have girls follow her around who weigh the amount that you would like for Shannon to weigh. If you don’t really like the fact that Shannon likes to keep her hair shoulder-length, pay a girl who has the hair you would prefer for Shannon to have to follow her around. It’s a way to taunt her without actually being present or insulting her to her face. It establishes your authority over her and hopefully she will begin to share your opinion that she is overweight and unattractive (not happening 😂). If you don’t really like the skincare routine she does, see if you can get your employees to befriend her to suggest something you would prefer watching (or– maybe don’t film her in the bathroom……? Just a thought) If you don’t really like Shannon’s posture, have a hunchback follow her around as a bit of a threat to her (you might have to fly this woman in). Shannon will certainly become terrified that she will turn out like this woman. ( As an aside, I have no intention of following people around, I don’t really like threats or scare tactics and I’m not corrupt, so I don’t see myself turning out like this one hunchback woman who he’s had following me around in both CA and Michigan 😂).

2. Since it’s hard to know when and where Shannon will be, get a geolocation tracker into her car and phone. Then, pay a group of women or men to take different ‘shifts’ in areas where you know Shannon frequents — say the gym or campus. Make sure there are always people there to be your eyes and ears and ‘gather information’ for you so you can seamlessly have your employees mimic, taunt, and harass her. Remember it’s very hard to psychologically abuse someone without the details really sorted out. Think through every possible scenario and take the time to anticipate behaviors with the individuals you have hired.. Hiring people to harass her accomplishes a few things — First, it shows you’re a tool. Second, it’s a great use of your time if you have exhausted all of your other victims/imaginary girlfriends. Thirdly, it shows just how committed and loyal you are to her. And fourthly, it totally increases your likelihood of hooking up with this girl. Shannon will totally seek you out and respect you if you do this.

3. Pay your employees just the amount they need. No need to go above 4 digits if they are not expecting 5 or 6. College students will sometimes take 3 but professionals often require 5, 6, or even 7. Sometimes you can pay a frat or sorority collectively. Weigh these options out. If an employee turns out to be talented, offer them a full-time contract.

4. Make sure you have wireless cameras and earpieces set up. You can talk into your employees earpieces and tell them exactly when to start talking or walking so that your employees will directly cross paths with your victim/imaginary girlfriend. It’s very hard to control and psychologically abuse someone if you can’t give immediate instructions to get in their direct line of sight; but more importantly if someone with a non-technical background picks up on your wireless camera’s and scripted earpieces- or even becomes aware of this possibility, it’s super easy to gaslight them(or try😂). Almost no honest people will believe her story or have the means to discover it, and no one will be with your victim/imaginary girlfriend long enough to pick up on the full extent of this the way your victim does. If there’s an audience when your employees are asked to stop following her from her car to campus or bathroom, ensure that your employee starts crying. This will help gain sympathy from the audience and more importantly — when the victim asks for some space or privacy, it makes her look like a bully. Use threats. Make fun of her in the bathroom so that she feels uncomfortable there. Dehumanize her. Gaslight her. Also consider giving your employees a script to tell her she should be institutionalized. 😂 All women who have been stalked by corrupt guys they don’t want to date and filmed without their consent should be institutionalized, yes?

5. When your victim/imaginary girlfriend is taking a test, make sure your employees are ready to distract, intimidate, or bully her. Consistently intimidate her. Criticize literally everything she does. Mimic her when she is sick. Do not let her establish trust or a reputation as an intelligent individual. Encourage her to shut down her social media. Cut out anything that makes her look credible, thoughtful, hard-working, competent, hilarious, loving, gorgeous, etc. Broadcast her mistakes; sneer at her talent; relish in the punishment that you dole out to her for her disobedience.

6. Get her into therapy and record her sessions. It is very, very difficult to psychologically abuse someone if you don’t know their insecurities, their plans, who they are dating, etc. The best way to do this is in therapy. Therapy recordings are a goldmine of information and so it’s imperative that you get her to go there. You can use information from these recordings to guide your employees to make her feel bad about whatever it is that is on her mind, to flatter her into certain behaviors, etc. In conjunction with mirroring her text messages, this can help you to intercept her from her friends, significant others, and people who are starting to believe her.

7. Broadcast recordings of her and take things out of context. Edit your content to whatever sounds offensive or stupid and make sure other unknowing and relatively honest people know about it. This gives you more people to mobilize and you won’t even need to pay them.

8. Take a page out of Jeff Epstein’s book and go to the police first. Find the thumbscrew, the compromised guy, and make sure he has some influence over others in the department. Again, if you don’t have the police on your side, it’s much harder to get away with this stuff. Befriend them early and often. Make sure they protect you.

9. Sing songs about her. Fantasize about her. Hallucinate about her. Show up in her backyard. Show up at her work. Bring girls you are hooking up with. Bring your mom. Make sure she knows that if she were to date you, she would have access to all the money that you steal from others. Make sure she knows that her ‘status’ would improve dramatically if she would just give you the respect you deserve. She could have that opportunity if she would just lose weight and shut up about how dishonest and abusive you are.

10. Some of your employees will be comfortable working together. They can text and share details, her location and sit down wherever she’s eating to listen to her conversations. Teamwork makes the dreamwork and it’s a great social currency. Do not, however, let these individuals know that the real reason you are upset with this girl is because she ‘disobeyed’ you 4.5 years ago. Employees may change their minds if they’re decent people or know your true motives. Let them think they’re the first ones.

11. Film her intimate relationships and also when she’s doing yoga! This is just for personal enjoyment.

12. After all your hard work pays off, hook up with the woman of your dreams!


Thanks for reading. Hope you never have to deal with this. ♥️♥️♥️

What it’s Like to be Stalked

I have had a stalker for four years, someone who is mentally ill and genuinely believes that he is in love with me. He is upset because I ‘disobeyed’ him, even though we never met. He is a pornography producer and con artist, and although 0% of his income is honest, his financial resources seem boundless. He has access to corrupt individuals and wireless cameras to film me naked and– I hate it. He spends his entire life — 24/7 — around the clock, monitoring my geolocation, my text messages, my phones calls, and paying people 6 and 7 digits to follow, mimic, taunt, intimidate, groom, insult, and harass me. I have changed my number and gotten five new phones. As hard as I try to move to a different home and outrun him (8 moves, 4 states), he finds me, finds new cleaning people to pay, new compromised people to exploit, new narratives to convince the boys, and new ways to harass me. He bullies me and he works HARD and incessantly at it. He is fiercely driven. He catfishes me. He pays guys to record me on dates. He broadcasts recordings of me. He films my intimate relationships. He pays people to stalk me around campus. I am not afraid of him anymore, but I hate it. It is exhausting and miserable.

I have never fully appreciated decent men (and women) before this. If you are an honest person — someone who doesn’t bother people, who doesn’t hurt people, who doesn’t ‘avenge’ people who don’t want to date you — please please please stay the same.

Socializing on Social Media

Nichols Arcade on campus

So, here is the truth. The truth is that social media has been my rescue flotation device over the last few years. I’ve dealt with a situation that I’ve found to be exhausting and, in all seriousness, social media has been the thing that has grounded me and helped me feel grateful for my friends and all the good things in life. It’s given me a platform to share. Sometimes sharing things with the world kind of ruins them, but more often than not it helps me to find good people and good things to focus on in sometimes turbulent moments.

Life is not always a breeze, and although I don’t think social media should be used to escape life, I do think there is immense value in sharing good news, recognizing the accomplishments of others, looking for inspiration, sharing kind words, and genuinely connecting with people with a goal of uplifting them. For example, I really admire Jennifer Anniston (not just for her skin care routine) because I think she has a big heart. So I follow her. I follow a lot of people who I feel like are sincere and authentic. In contrast, I feel like both on and off line I have found people with the most bizarre motives and obsessive personalities, and sometimes I just need to connect with something or someone good. I want to be a good, real person, and I want to connect with good, real people. For whatever reason, it take some extra energy and effort to connect with those types these days.

Anyway, below is a sliver of my life over the past few months. I’m back in Michigan wrapping up my master’s and hoping to move back to California if the right job presents itself. Hope this finds you healthy and well. If you find my happiness to be nauseating, or it makes you feel bad about your weight or your life or something — close the tab! xxx ilysm


the Dexter Cider Mill
the Jolly Pumpkin..
hahaha this is so true
This is the picture I go back to when I need it. Look how pretty my sister is.
hbd Jenna!!
Jessie has a hot pot
Arastradero Preserve. This is near where I went mountain biking.
That inside is a mushroom, not meat.
B school
I beat Derek in eight consecutive ping-pong games. EIGHT. So he had to purchase this for me. 😊
It’s nice to have an ex who doubles as a thoughtful loving person. V brought me my favorite food from India.
The nice thing about moving is that it doesn’t require any work and it’s always really easy.
This is my trainer.
Those rolls are a real crowd-pleaser.
He helps me to sculpt my body.

Have a wonderful end of September. 🙂

Navel-Gazing Update: Spring, Summer, East Coast and West Coast, Board Game Parties, & Golf


How are you doing! Technically it is summer– my favorite season as long as there’s a pool nearby– but it feels like a brand new season. I think this whole year should have its own season, and we should call it ‘new’ or ‘life-feels-like-it-did-the-first-time’, or something like that.

Spring and Summer have been good to me- lots of great food and trying to figure out which coast I like better — East or West. Honestly, I don’t know if I will ever decide.

As much as I love the Bae, I will always feel like I am cheating on the East Coast while I’m here.

Below are some pictures for you! I hope you love them.

/\/\/\/\/\Four boys for every girl! I love Silicon Valley.

In March we tried out the ramen place in Palo Alto, the one that always has a line down the street. It was good but suuuuper heavy. It’s an item checked off of my bucket list. \/ \/ \/

\/ \/The reason you pay so much to live in California is because of the outdoors. There are so many hikes I still need to do and so many perfect days. Pacifica, below, never disappoints 🥳☀️.

Grabbing boba with these ambitious girls. \/ \/

\/ \/ I ordered the rice clay pot from Merit Vegetarian.

\/ \/ birthdays and pizza

\/ \/ Pinky doing the catwalk.

East Coast: \/ \/ There are three people in this picture! So happy for you Missy!

West coast: went up to Bocce Bar in Sausalito, mostly for the views, since Bocce was still closed. We ate these delicious desserts. \/ \/ \/ \/

\/ \/ Toga day!

\/ \/The Georgetown crew teams practicing on the Potomac:

In other news, XKCD is here to explain most board game parties. Hilariously accurate.

And a quote I just found from Dave Barry about golf:

“Although golf was originally restricted to overweight Protestants, today it’s open to anybody who owns hideous clothing.” 😂

I don’t actually hate golf 🏌️‍♀️, but there is some truth to that! Do you like to golf? Do you like to *watch* golf? 🧐

Hope you have a stellar weekend!


My Jabras 75t Review

Going back to college was a weird experience, because suddenly I felt like I was immersed in the trends that I had had the privilege of ignoring for several years. I usually listened to skillshare tutorials on the way to class, and I was always putting the mess of wires in and out of my backpack. While I was busy resenting my tangle of wired earbuds, it seemed that truly everyone else had wireless ones.

One of the things I was constantly reminded of during covid was that background noise helps me to stay focused. Silence is my arch nemesis. I need a movie, a podcast, a lecture or some noise going on to get me focused.

So recently, I finally took the leap and got wireless earbuds from Jabra. They are fantastic. 🎉🥳 I’m probably last to this party, but being able to walk into the kitchen while still focusing on a meeting on the computer, is such a liberating experience.

A few quick facts, if you’re interested in purchasing these:

  • They are very tightly bundled into your ear. They don’t move at all on a run.

  • The LED lights will flash to let you know the charge status as soon as you open the case. If they are fully charged, they will show green, if they are low on charge they show yellow, and if they have no power they are red.

  • The earbuds charge while they are in the case. There’s a little magnet in the earbuds that pulls them into their fitted spot and it’s actually really satisfying pop them in and out.

  • In the case, it takes 2 hours for the earbuds to fully charge.

  • They have Active Noise Cancellation and Hear through settings. The battery lasts longer on Hear through.

  • The case itself needs to be charged; I use my mac computer charger because it’s faster than the one it comes with.

  • They come in green, black, navy blue, sienna (pink), gold, and gray.

  • You can mute and unmute yourself by clicking the button on the earbud.

  • They cost a whopping $180. In about ten years, I will get back to you on whether or not they are worth that number.

  • I get a LOT more done with these. With them, I want to go running, I want to go to my ZOOM meetings and classes, and I like to get into the flow and rhythm or getting work done.

I hope this is helpful to you! And that you’re having a fabulous last week of June and first week of July!


School ended earlier this month, which means presents, candles, cards, and a bittersweet feeling. Although I love the gifts, I really cherish the cards from the students with specific memories and things they have learned this year. 

I am so proud of our graduates. In our ten months together, they worked so hard and improved immensely. Graduation was a wild, beautiful, gorgeous success in which each of the eighth-grade students gave a speech they had written. They also performed a song on guitar together.

The ceremony was on the front lawn of a gorgeous home on Stanford campus, lined with roses and across the street from a house built by Frank Lloyd Wright. After the speeches, we had catered organic tacos and the graduates swam with their little brothers and sisters in the pool. 

Here is my graduation speech. I hope you like it. 

One day over the summer of 2020, two concerned parents here in Palo Alto had a chat about the coming school year and talked over an idea of creating a small school with a group of students. In this school, students would learn and study the four core subjects for four days each week, and then have a fifth day of project-based learning. They shared the idea with two other parents, who joined the effort to create a positive learning experience for their students this year. 

These four spent hundreds of hours on the phone, trying to convince family friends to join in this idea. At last, they found the students and teachers to start their own school. 

At 8:30 am on August 24, 2020, Justin, Natalie, Zach, Max, Katherine, and Hannah became part of the first and last year of Sage Academy. 

This has been a unique year. 

While covid has continued, people around the world have made sacrifices to support each other, and your parents have made sacrifices to support you.

This year, you’ve worn a mask to school every day. You’ve had the chance to celebrate birthdays and holidays together, with just the six of you. You’ve had the chance to learn cooking, mindfulness, Chinese, Spanish, sports, film, guitar and more.

You’ve also had the chance to study and challenge yourself in the four core subjects–math,  science, English and history.

In English, you have grown in reading and writing, developed your own voices, learned the rules of language, learned to critically evaluate online information, and practiced using new words to help you express your thinking. I have loved watching you grow in English. 

In US history, you have learned how the idea of the United States first started, its initial failures and successes, its immense growth, conflicts, and its changing beliefs and ideals. You’ve challenged the perspectives of historians and you’ve learned about important leaders in America. 

Recently, you memorized Gettysburg address, in which Lincoln urged Americans to honor the sacrifices made on the battlefield, by working to maintain the country.  Similarly, I hope that you can continue to honor the sacrifices that have been made for you, by continuing to work hard towards your goals. 

I’d like to share a few of your individual strengths that I’ve gotten to see this year. 


You’re a talented reader and writer. Whenever there is a quiet moment in discussion, I can always count on you to chime in with your knowledge and inferences. I appreciate your humility and honesty and I always catch you doing nice things for others. Thank you for sharing your sense of humor and hard work with our class this year. 


I’ll always remember when I found out that you and Katherine were not allowed to shoot in the basketball game against the boys, in order to make the game more fair for them! I thought that was hilarious. 

 You are such a capable leader, and I am thrilled by your love of words! I get goosebumps when you speak passionately about your beliefs. You have a critical eye for motives in history and I hope that you always stay hungry to lead others. The world needs good leaders. Thank you for sharing your writing, your voice, and your leadership this year. 


You have grown so much this year, and have done a great job of learning to express your thinking in your writing.  You are always willing to think independently. I appreciate your positive attitude during both simulation games, and your detailed class presentations on the geography of Killer Angels. I love your passion for new information, especially related to technology and finance. Thank you for your hard work, dedication, and helpfulness this year. 


Your sense of humor, adventure, and creativity have added much to our classroom. You make learning fun, and always put a positive spin on things. I especially enjoyed your ‘two truths and a lie’ presentation as well as your drawing assignments to memorize things in history. 

This school year, you have asked good questions about how to improve your writing. Thank you for asking those questions, and striving for growth. 


You always strive for perfection.  You are my executive assistant and secretary, so hungry to excel. I often notice you doing thoughtful things for your friends. You have developed as a speaker and  writer and with your drive, focus, and work ethic, I know you’ll continue to develop in every direction. Thank you for your conscientious work and consistency this year. 


You are so humble, teachable, and funny. You have clear writing and are so interested in feedback. One of my memories from this year was your speech during the Patriots and Loyalists simulation. The sixth-graders couldn’t stop talking about how inspiring it was. You have a great presence and a wonderful attitude. Your competitive spirit in the simulation games made it more fun for everyone. Thank you for always asking more questions and coming to extra google meets.

Thank you for letting me be a part of this wonderful school year!

Congratulations to the one and only Sage Academy Class of 2021!

Ana and her Great-Grandmother Sloan’s Pound Cake

I have a wonderful friend named Ana, and she is the type of person who you could chat with about anything. She’s cheerful and fun and curious about all of the things I love to talk about. She is perfect for a chatty girl like myself. She is the sort of person who makes you feel like you’re best friends with her, but….you’re pretty sure she makes everyone feel like that- 😅

Thanks to instagram, I discovered Ana’s secret weapon/talent/love of cooking, and I am here to broadcast it to the world📢. Below, Ana shares about her love affair with food and a pound cake recipe. I hope you love it! and feel free to add your name to her list of best friends here.

From Ana:

I love food. I’ve always been a fan of food. I was the sort of food-obsessed kid that would journal about exceptional meals and kept a mental catalogue of all of my “life changing” food experiences. 

When it comes to where my ardent devotion for food comes from, there is the question of nature vs nurture I guess. My dad is originally from Greece and his mother, my YiaYia is one of the best cooks I’ve ever known. A colleague of my husband said of Greeks the most important factors to being Greek are: family, food and laughing loudly. That feels right to me. Add to that the fact that I grew up in the south with a healthy dose of southern cooking and hospitality and my love of food seems inevitable.

One of my favorite people as a child was my great grandmother. Her name was Emily Sloan but everyone called her Sloan. Growing up I can remember watching Wheel of Fortune, The Price is Right or Little House on the Prairie with her and drinking Tang which she would proudly declare the astronauts even drank.

She was hilarious and had many choice sayings like “Well I’ll swan!” or “I wish I had a swing like that in my backyard!” or “It beats the hen ‘a pecking.” Or “As nervous as a long tailed cat in a room full of rockers.” Too many more to name. One of my early memories is of her oohing and aahing to my impromptu choreography and dancing around her small apartment. She was lively and warm with an infectious spirit with an enormous heart.

One of my grannie’s signature dishes was her pound cake. She made it in a bundt pan and would make it a little underdone so it was extra soft. It is a pretty simple recipe but you definitely wanna grease it generously or be prepared for it to stick. Though it does taste quite good even if it sticks. 

I paired it with some fresh sliced peaches bathed in diluted apricot jam and crème fraîche sweetened with powdered sugar and a dash of pink sea salt.

While my family and I were visiting my parents in Texas having what my dad likes to refer to as “an eating vacation” we made and ate at least one every day! As Grannie would say, “I could eat my weight in that!” We surely did try to.


Sloan’s Pound Cake

2 C. Sugar

1 C. Butter-Softened 

5 Eggs

2 C. Flour 

2 tsp Vanilla extract 

Generously grease & flour Bundt Pan. 

Cream Butter & Sugar; Add Eggs 1 at a time beating constantly. Add Vanilla & then add flour gradually. Pour batter into pan. It will be thick so you can spoon it in if you want.

Bake @ 325 for 45 minutes or until top starts getting brown and a toothpick comes out clean. 

Thank you for sharing Emily Sloan and her recipe, Ana! Please invite us over for lunch soon. ☺️

What is NYU like?

My friend Jackie just started at NYU this past year! Although she can’t speak to a normal year at NYU, she generously offered to share her experiences with you here. Hope you can enjoy it vicariously.

What is NYU like?

Some of my favorite memories from my first year at NYU are walking around for hours with my friend Theo, a native New Yorker. One of the first weeks after he and I met, we walked all the way from NYU’s campus to Central Park and back as the sun set. Every glimpse I caught of a beautiful mural or brick buildings that complement each other perfectly was accompanied with the thought, “wow! I actually live here!” I can’t begin to count how many times throughout the year I had that realization, accompanied with the knowledge that I get to spend the rest of my college experience in New York City.

My time at NYU this year is by no means representative of the typical NYU freshman experience, but NYU has specific characteristics that undoubtedly persist without a pandemic. NYU’s student body is extremely diverse, with no single race making up more than 25% of its population. This means that, for the first time in my life, I am the only white person in my friend group, which includes an international student from South Korea.

The core curriculum courses I have taken this year, specifically the First Year Seminar and the Writing the Essay Class, have been incredibly inclusive and progressive in their curriculum and in the class discussions we have that are facilitated by the professor. LGBTQ+ rights, racial equality, and feminism are issues that are emphasized as valid and crucial to the improvement of our society in NYU’s classes. 

Many people warned me that while New York City can be an enchanting place to live, it can quickly become a very lonely city. I have made great friends this year, whom I have really enjoyed spending my weekends out and about with, but I do understand this warning better than I had hoped I would. I spent many days without leaving my hall or seeing anyone other than those in my computer screen. It is easy to find yourself without plans to see friends for days on end, and without your family nearby, it can be really, really lonely. I think it just takes a special effort to make sure you aren’t spending so much time alone.

I am so excited to spend the rest of my college experience in the city. I’m even hoping to study abroad in Shanghai this spring! Getting to spend some of your best years in New York City is a magical experience and I’m so glad my college experience will forever tie me to one of the best cities in the world.

Thank you tons Jacqueline! So excited for your next three years of outdoor life at NYU!

Navel-gazing Update: What your Social Security Number Reveals about Your Personality.

Before discovering the Myers Briggs personality test, I’ve never really cared what color my parachute is or anything like that. I felt like most of those quizzes were basically a MASH game and smoke and mirrors.

But if you’ve had a conversation with me in the last several months, you have heard me talk about my obsession with Myers Briggs. I’m an ENFP, and the more I have read about ENFP’s, the more I’ve understood my own needs and thinking. I feel like studying the MBTI personalities has also helped me to better understand how to make other people happy. 

Anyway, in keeping with my newfound respect for personality tests, I thought I would share one of my own. This one is based on scientific evidence. Be sure to keep your answers private. 

What your SSN reveals about your personality:

Cardamom Pancakes with Grapefruit Basil Syrup

Processed with VSCO with k3 preset

Jessica Payne and I were in the freshmen dorms together and she is the funnest! Post-college, in Arlington, Jessica secretly started an instagram account for our favorite legs – Logan’s calves – and solicited anonymous photos from anyone who could steal a secret photo of that eye candy. 😂👏👏 Aren’t those spectacular?

I didn’t know that Jessica is a professional chef and sous-chef until I started following her on instagram. Below is a delightful recipe Jessica developed with a combination of fruity, warm, tart, sweet and savory flavors. You can see more of her delicious work here.

Cardamom Pancakes with Grapefruit Basil Syrup


3/4 C (118g) all-purpose flour

1/4 C (37g) spelt flour

2 Tbsp (28g) sugar

1 Tbsp (9g) cardamom

1 Tbsp (12g) baking powder

1/2 tsp (6g) salt

1 C(250ml) oat milk

1 Tbsp (14g) apple cider vinegar

1 tsp (6g) vanilla bean paste or 1 tsp (5g) vanilla extract

2 Tbsp (29g) began butter (Miyoko’s vegan cultured butter is a good choice)


1 cup (322g) pure maple syrup

3 Tbsp (43g) fresh grapefruit juice

1 tsp (2g) grapefruit zest

1/2 cup (10g) basil leaves


  1. In a medium bowl, combine flours, sugar, cardamom, baking powder, and salt.
  2. In a liquid measuring cup, combine oat milk, apple cider vinegar, and vanilla.
  3. Pour the liquid mixture into the dry mixture, while whisking, bit by bit to avoid clumping. Whisk until smooth. Add melted vegan butter. Whisk again.
  4. Let the batter rest for 30 minutes.
  5. Pour about 1/3 cup (64 grams) of batter onto a nonstick pan or griddle over medium heat.
  6. When the top begins to bubble and the edges have set, flip the pancake and cook until golden on the reverse side.
  7. Meanwhile, heat a small saucepan over low heat. Add the maple syrup, grapefruit juice, grapefruit zest and basil leaves to the saucepan and simmer for 20 minutes.
  8. Remove the syrup from the heat and strain onto a heat-proof container to serve alongside the pancakes.
  9. Drizzle the grapefruit basil syrup over your pancakes and enjoy!

Thank you so much Jessica! We’re looking forward to your next recipe and secret instagram account!